Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
