so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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