today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
send nudes
from the living room?
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
