if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize