I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
