come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
