She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
