Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize