I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
