Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
