There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i think i have herpe
just one?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
