David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
