it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
this boner is exhausting
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
third nipple confirmed
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
