if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Randomize
