Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
