Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
