So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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