I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Randomize
