Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
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