i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
