Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
