Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Randomize
