I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
You dont lie about slip and slides
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
