Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(614): View more from Ohio

Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?

(410): View more from Maryland

Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women

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(941): View more from Florida

Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.

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(614): View more from Ohio

I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar

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(206): View more from Washington

What should I wear?

(808): View more from Hawaii

Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar

(206): View more from Washington

I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."

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(260): View more from Indiana

how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?

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(425): View more from Washington

That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.

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(207): View more from Maine

All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.

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