My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
