idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
