If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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