There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
