Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
