I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Semen is not good for contacts.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
