I'm lost and stupid without you.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
birth control should be required to get into college
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
