Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
