Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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