I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
