help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
no. you can't hotbox the world.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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