erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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