i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
