he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
