her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
