You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
