butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
