Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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