I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
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