they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
