I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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