Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
