Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Sorry about my life...
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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