he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
