soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
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