We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
