i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
