STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I touched a dick in church today
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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