I wannas sexs uuuuu
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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